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Saturday, February 13, 2010

Valentine's Day should not just be one day!

So tomorrow is Valentine’s Day and in my opinion is one of the highest pressure days of the year.  If you are single Valentine’s Day is a day to remind you that you are single and make you feel bad about that even if on the other 364 days of the year you are happy to be single.    I remember in my single days seeing all of my women friends who had boyfriends get flowers at work and I felt jealous.  On Valentine’s Day you want to be with someone even if that someone is not the right person.

Now that I am married Valentine’s Day has taken on a whole new meaning. My husband is very sweet and romantic and goes out of his way to make me feel special but now that we have a child those opportunities for romance are few and far between and often have to be scheduled and planned which often leads to the romance being sucked out of the situation to be honest. I have found myself planning for this day for weeks and while we are financially very conservative I wanted to make sure that I planned the perfect gift for him. I am not going to say what it is in this blog because he often reads it but I will let you know if he has a “wow” moment tomorrow when he sees his gift.  My husband who in his own sweet way has not been able to plan anything yet is as I write this at the store searching for the perfect gift.  To make it easier on him I gave him a list of things that would make me happy but now that he is gone with the list I have something to tell him that money cannot buy that I realized last night after almost a decade of being with my husband.

Last night I went and saw the movie “Valentine’s Day.”  It is a must see and without spoiling the plot for you the movie has a very important message for everyone-single or married.  The characters in the movie learn that love is accepting a person for who they are-faults and all and loving them in good times and bad.  Love also means that it is not all fireworks and romance-what the characters learned is what is most important is to marry not a person that you are just physically attracted to but to marry your best friend. As I was watching the movie I remembered that although I call one or two of my female friends my best friends and they are but my true best friend is my husband.  He has seen me at my best and at my worse and still loves me-that is a best friend. Attraction gets altered by the pressures of marriage and parenthood but if you have your best friend to be married to nothing can change that.

That being said whatever my husband is out there buying me right now does not matter. What matters is I married my best friend.  For those of you who are sad about tomorrow being Valentine’s Day don’t be.  Valentine’s Day should not be just one day of year on February 14th. When you are married or single Valentine’s Day should be every day.  Valentine’s Day should not be about buying something to give that special person on that one day.  Valentine’s Day should be a day to start of a year of showing that person that you love them every day.  Tonight when my husband and I have our long elusive date night that we are not able to do very often I will look across the table at my Valentine and remember that Valentine’s Day is about spending it with the person you love, your best friend who in my lucky case is my husband.

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